So instead of putting up journals that people will undoubtedly ignore, I’ll be making Meme journals of my own creation. The most common of them will probably be this one right here, simply because music is a huge part of my life. I listen to it when I’m happy, sad, angry, frustrated, indifferent, and random. I sometimes even have music playing when I’m watching videos or playing games. I’ve never really shared any type of explanation as to why I listen to what I do, but it’s a good time to start now. Maybe it’ll help people understand my mind a bit easier.
For starters, simply look what she’s holding. I’ve said that recently to a dear friend of mine…and it didn’t end well. I’m now trying to make up for what happened right then. Both her and I were put through so much then, and now I’m afraid that I won’t have my friend anymore. Now the song comes into play because I thought she was leaving me. That hurt like a knife with a serrated edge being pulled down while still avoiding anywhere that would result in death. I know that she felt the same way when she thought I was walking away. I never did…I couldn’t even stand the thought of losing someone that I’m so close to. I didn’t even know about this version of the song until recently. I found it while searching for the Rascal Flatts version. I’ve spent so much time wanting to get things back. I don’t know if that’s possible, but I have to try. The song depicts exactly how I felt, and when I realized all that she went through…I couldn’t help but do I could to get my friend back. I still feel like crap, but at least things are sorta coming back together. I’m not doing this for anyone but her. Yes. I missed her, but in many ways, I don’t deserve a good friend like her. I’m just making up for lost time and shed tears. Even if I never completely get her back to what she was before, I won’t stop trying. I’d rather die than stop trying. I don’t want the pain to stop if it means causing more pain, even if I have to hide it from those who care about me.
This song really hit me hard. I spent my entire life with people looking down on me. Nobody cared, even if others did things like me. They were better, and I was nothing, or at least that’s the way they made me feel. I couldn’t do anything right, yet I kept on trying. People never saw on the same level as them simply because I was different. I didn’t adhere to their standards, but I didn’t do anything wrong. I was simply always thinking on another level, and people were upset because they couldn’t understand me. I never really understood people either. I wanted to though. I kept on trying to figure out why people did things the way that they did. I still do, but I know that most people don’t really know themselves. They don’t take the time to think on what’s going on. They just act on impulse, and that’s why this song is one that I really associate myself with.
This song is one of my happy songs. It’s all about numbers and time and what we do with our time. It’s kind of like a scope on humans in general. We don’t realize how much time we waste, but as time goes by, we have what we need to be happy. Even those of us who hate wasting time, will waste time if it’s for someone else.
Another happy song all about not forgetting to be awesome. It’s not as deeply intertwined in my mind as the others. It’s just a fun song by one of my favorite musicians.
I think that’s all for today. I’ll catch you later.